As of recently, the company I work for has started expanding internationally ....at a pretty extreme rate. We are getting larger offices in Manchester & opening new offices in Madrid & in a few months, somewhere equally as "cool" in Australia.
Many of my peers at the company have expressed interest in traveling abroad & helping open these branches - all while living/working in a new country for a few years. *Insert envy here* The problem is - I can't figure out why I'm envious. Do I really WANT to live in a foreign country I know nothing about for a year ....2 years? I'm not sure. Do I think it's a once in a lifetime experience that would teach me amazing things? Absolutely.
So that's where I stand. I know if I really wanted to pursue these avenues I could express interest in it to the company & would most likely be allowed to follow my dreams across the pond for a year or two of wonderful adventures. So why don't I ?
I don't want the reason I go to be just because "everyone is" & "it would be cool". I mean all of those things apply right away, but in all reality its a HUGE adjustment & a HUGE responsibility they are taking upon themselves. They will miss their families, friends, weddings, births, & any number of "huge" life events while they are gone. But is it worth it? Possibly.
My family & bf has recently pointed out that I dont necessarily always pursue something because I want to or am passionate about it - but many times because I want to be the best at it. I want to be the BEST at everything & prove that I can do it. I've applied for jobs just to know that I could get them & then turned them down. Signed up for classes to complete, just to know that I could do it. Become a representative for numerous projects just to show that I could be successful doing it.
Don't get me wrong - I wouldnt continue doing these things if I didn't enjoy them to an extent. I am very happy with my decision to sell Stella & Dot jewelry. I believe in it. I believe its beautiful. & I KNOW I love jewelry. I believe in my decision to become a licensed realtor. I know its a smart decision. I know it could be useful in the future.
But a small part of me knows or wonders if I'm just doing these things to feel like I'm continually 'growing' as a person & continually 'improving' my life....
I said this to bf today:
Babe – I’m
having a really hard time with everyone moving & going overseas &
everything . I feel like I’m not doing “enough” in my life .
Like I’m taking the easy way out & not striving to achieve enough & go
there & do that & be good at it.
He
said:
That’s b/c you
need a direction. You just see everything and want to be great at everything.
Find a road and be the best damn driver on the road. Mine would be residential
real estate in NE
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